"Suddenly for a fraction of a second, we feel that our whole life is justified, our sins forgiven, and that love is still the strongest force, one that can transform us forever.
But at the same time we feel afraid. Surrendering completely to love, be it human or divine, means giving up everything, including our own well-being or our ability to make decisions. It means loving in the deepest sense of the word. The truth is that we don't want to be saved in the way God has chosen; we want to keep absolute control over our every step, to be fully conscious of our decisions, to be capable of choosing the object of our devotion.
It isn't like that with love--it arrives, moves in, and starts directing everything. Only very strong souls allow themselves to be swept along..."
~ excerpt from the novel, The Witch of Portobello, by Paulo Coelho
Exhaustion...is one word I've been feeling lately. I've continued my body therapy appointments and exercises. The last time I saw Mr. Lin he told me I wasn't getting enough rest. Huh?...is it that obvious? Same thing happened when a friend took me to a Chinese Medicine/Herbal shop...fascinating place. They took one look at me and said the same thing. Whoa...is it that obvious? Naturally, I walked away with a few herbs to make tea with. The shop was pretty darn neat. Everything it should be...with barrels of roots, herbs, tonics, teas, and other amazing things I had never laid eyes on before but have read about. With only some preliminary study on Chinese Herbalism it was a great experience to get a closer look.
So basically all I need is a bit more rest.
I had another demo last Saturday. Did 2nd series. Talk about a wild ride. Thank God, it's my last one. Let's just say it was on a full moon evening...a particularly HOT full moon evening...
It felt as if every channel in my body was ripped open...wide open...and a higher amount of energy was coursing through than normal. Its strange. At this point, it isn't about being open anymore...it's about somehow harnessing the energy...aligning the energy...something I still need to learn and discover.
Something that may or may not come to light in daily practice. We'll see. Enough said.
At any rate...the following day I felt wrung out. In a good way.