Trust

10.3.08


































"No more words. Hear only the voice with in." ~Rumi


Long time since I've written. I guess I've been hiding out too long. The last several months I have found myself hyper-sensitive to everything around me. And, somehow with all the feelings that have bombarded me...honestly, I have had a hard time channeling it...dealing with it all. It's not necessarily a bad thing...moving from a thinking mind to a feeling presence is something I am trying to grow into. Its just this damn sensitivity I'm experiencing...sometimes it feels as if its too big for me to handle...but somehow it ends up okay when I allow it to flow no matter how painful it is...I don't mean to paint a dismal picture...because honestly it doesn't have to be that way...I guess when observing, listening...being...so much comes to the surface that may have been hiding under a cloud of distraction...or delusion.

I spent the last two months in Mexico...what a beautiful country. What beautiful people. I went down there for nothing more than love. Yeah...call me a silly little girl...but its true...nothing more, nothing less. Was my love tested? I can definitely say...yes. But, has it wavered? I can without a doubt say...no. A relationship I feel can teach you many things. And, many times, I can see where I start not to trust...and become scared, insecure...often that can come out in a relationship. And, it all starts with me...not the other person. Its unbelievable how another one can become a mirror. Yes, yes...I have much to learn...but that's why I'm here...or else I would have graduated to the land of enlightenment...haha...

Above all...my trip to Mexico taught me many things...and I had the pleasure of seeing much of the country...traveling from northern Mexico all the way south...amazing. And to my wonderful tour guide and boyfriend...you are something truly special. I admire your humanity. I'm in awe with all that you give. Part of the intrigue is that you don't even realize just how wonderful you are. Faith and trust in something bigger and larger than us is all we have...and I know it will see us through. I love you.

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