When first flying off to Iceland I had the pains of separation. From my partner in life. To my practice partner. I soon realized how connected I felt to my boyfriend. Two months can feel like a long time. Being separated for long periods before, we are able to manage the distance with as much grace as possible. With a job that takes me far and away from time to time, it becomes a practice in deep appreciation for someone that has affected my life in a beautiful way. When that person is no longer beside me, there is space to reflect. One of the profound ways to see and feel gratitude even though it isn't always easy to be apart. Though, in the same breath, there's a comfortableness within the separation, a common bond of faith and value in how we see the world beyond time and space. No matter where, I feel closely held, and comforted. This I cherish.
What makes it easier is work I enjoy. I couldn't be happier and more appreciative to have followed my heart into doing what I feel passionate about. From pains of insecurity, to being broke and penniless, I've been pushed into the practice of trust and faith. Not always an easy feet, with boundless opportunities to learn and heal, I guess I wouldn't have had it any other way. Though, I wipe my head with relief I somehow survived the crazy chaos of following my heart.
There is still much uncertainty, regarding everything. When finally accepting that uncertainty will always reside in the here and now, somehow brings comfort. Security blankets can be as illusory as anything else. Change is always happening. No matter what.
With the tides of life I'm not sure I'll always be prepared to handle the ride, but I know what's important for me today. It's the best I can do. I've had special opportunities to look around with wonder.
I may not be writing the story, but I can surly stand in glorious honor and reflection of what's been revealed and what is yet to be known. Truly living has a way of exposing the light even in the darkest of times.
Can I be crazy in saying that those dark times have been just as important as the light? Those moments where I was brought down to my knees. Everything broken. Thank God for those cracks. Finally to be free of the hard shell weighing me down.
Already, the vast landscape of being in a new land has brought me into moments of sacred contemplation. If feels good to enter into this space and feel the beauty of ALL life experience.