Eka Pada Sirsasana

Love & Fear

"There are only two seeming realities in this world and one of them is an illusion. There is either fear or love. Where there is fear there can be no love. Where there is love there can be no fear. Love cannot co-exist with fear. Fear cannot co-exist with love. They are mutually exclusive. There is at any given moment all fear or all love. There cannot be a fearful love or a loving fear."

(Take Me To Truth: Undoing the Ego, by Nouk Sanchez & Tomas Vieira)

I absolutely love the above the excerpt from the book I'm currently reading/studying. One thing I can appreciate is when a book of this nature cuts through the frilly bullshit and gets straight to the point in a fairly gentle way. Why sugar coat it?

There really isn't much to say beyond what has already been said above ...

Authenticity

Authenticity is a daily practice ...

Choosing authenticity means:
Cultivating the COURAGE to be imperfect, to set boundaries, and allow ourselves to be vulnerable; exercising the COMPASSION that comes from knowing that we are all made of strength and struggle and connected to each other through a loving and resilient human spirit; nurturing the CONNECTION and sense of belonging that can happen when we let go of what we are supposed to be and embrace who we are.

Authenticity demands WHOLEHEARTED living and loving - even when it's hard, even when we're wrestling with the shame and fear of not being good enough, and especially when the joy is so intense that we're afraid to let ourselves feel it.

Mindfully practicing authenticity during our most soul-searching struggles is how we invite GRACE, JOY, and GRATITUDE into our lives.

- Brené Brown

No-Nothingness

"Earth provides enough to satisfy every man’s need, but not every man’s greed."

(Mahatma Gandhi)

A recurring theme, not knowing. Not knowing, is an absolutely retched place for the ego, but in turn, keeps us open and receptive. It brings back our curious nature, and inherent innocence. As we abandon our thinking mind, we sit in a space of feeling and intuition.

Inhabiting a place of not knowing used to be such a frightening place, and still can be, however, now, I've learned how to embrace it with practice.

During our weekly Hanuman Chalisa chanting, one of the lovely ladies in our group pointed out the translation of one of the early verses that truly drove it home.

The passionate verse states ...

I don't know anything, so I remember you, Son of the Wind;
Grant me strength, intelligence, and wisdom,
and remove my impurities and sorrows.

Osho also has his own commentary on this state, that is more descriptive regarding emptiness, or as he coins ... no-nothingness.

Being "in the gap" can be disorienting and even scary. Nothing to hold on to, no sense of direction, not even a hint of what choices and possibilities might lie ahead. But it was just this state of pure potential that existed before the universe was created. All you can do now is to relax into this no-thingness...fall into this silence between the words...watch this gap between the outgoing and incoming breath. And treasure each empty moment of the experience. Something sacred is about to be born.

Often emptiness has a negative connotation when it comes from a place of lack or feeling less than who we truly are. However, emptiness can be a good feeling when it comes from a place of connectedness, not desiring anything, but feeling the fulfillment of pure being. I like to call it spaciousness. The word, or experience, is rooted in feeling expansive, open and fully ALIVE.

When contemplating this, I take pause at how much of my life, and self-esteem, came from identifying with or to something, like it gave me a sense of self, when in reality it only strengthened my falseness and stifled me. Life is about living and learning, and it brought me here, so I'm appreciative of all that I've walked through. It's funny and interesting how it always goes back to letting go.

Let it go, let flow.

Let go, let God.

When I stand in awareness, all I need, is given ... all I desire, is here ...

The Shack

"Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing in your own sunshine"

(Ralph Waldo Emerson)

As I birthday present, I was given the book, The Shack, by WM. Paul Young. A modern day phenomenon, with over 7 million copies in print, and making the New York Times Besterseller list at #1 for some time, I was left wondering how I hadn't come across the title yet. At any rate, unbeknown to be, it's hugely popular, inspiring to many, and delves into the questions of religion and spirituality. Though, I haven't started to read it yet I was blown away at all the rave reviews I came across, often hearing that it awakens the soul, and quickens the spirit.

Has anybody out there read this book? Any thoughts? I already have a stack of books to get through so it maybe several weeks till I get to it, but I'm curious.

Intermediate Series Back Bends

33

"Everybody comes from the same source. if you hate another human being, you’re hating a part of yourself." (Elvis)

Today marks my 33rd trip around the sun. Lol, I like to look at it that way. I did a bit of research on the number 33 and it seems to be a number of completion. Also, 33 = Truth...hmmmm, interesting. I like. Also, 33 is the age Jesus was crucified and 3 days later resurrected.

With that being said, I feel as if, yes, a part of me is ready to die, while in the same breath I'm ready to be reborn. What a lovely profound feeling. The more I let go, the less I suffer, and have the space and capacity to know and feel Love.

I've felt an abundance of love on this day and I thank all who made it possible. Love you all!

Viparita Chakrasana

At a later date I'll post a video of full Viparita Charkrasana, tic-toc-ing back and forth, however I wanted to show the first phase progression.

Not Knowing

“What your heart thinks is great, is great. The soul’s emphasis is always right.”

(Ralph Waldo Emerson)

Sharing an excerpt from the book, Take Me To Truth, regarding not knowing, being in a place of openness, and often uncertainty, that really struck a cord with me. I've had to learn time and time again how to sit in a place on not knowing, which is never easy, but getting easier. It makes me wonder how I ever had the energy to want to control so much in my life before.

Humility and open-mindedness are precious to us. The journey of ego-release takes us headlong into a dimension on not-knowing, the absolute opposite of the ego's compulsive need to know and to control. The ego has no core of truth on which to rely. Its compulsion for separation and specialness is to feed its pseudo-worthiness and false sense of security. Our Unified Self trust implicitly that all changes are necessarily beneficial, no matter how uncomfortable they may be initially. It knows it is infinitely safe, secure, and worthy; hence it has no need for our familiar obsession with control and the need to know. It realized that not knowing is really the only place that provides the space to deliver Truth. Universal Intelligence in the form of knowledge is realized in proportion to our release from ego. It is paradox that can only be truly accepted when we plunge into not knowing and now moment awareness; suddenly Truth reveals Itself and Knowledge in the most Infinite context is remembered.

Not knowing is a pre-requisite for True Knowledge because 99.9% of the reality we have believed to be true is not true at all. The following analogy seems to fit this well: quantum physicists have proven that 99.9% of solid matter, e.g. our bodies, furniture, cars, and buildings, is empty space. It is actually oscillating energy and not solid at all! yet we are conditioned to believe the opposite, that we and everything in this universe are solid.

That just about sums up how much we need to unlearn or dis-identify with through the ego-release process. This is not said to cause despondency; it is a Truth that we begin this Undoing journey as largely ignorant and the path is made easier if we openly admit to not knowing. This attitude will reduce much of our resistance, which in turn will diminish our fear and doubt.

(Take Me To Truth, by Nouk Sanchez & Tomas Vieira)

Drop Backs

Irreverent in the Reverent

“The less you open your heart to others, the more your heart suffers.”

(Depak Chopra)

Lately, I've gotten into interesting conversations with fellow yoga practitioners, teachers and students regarding the unfolding that naturally happens within a yoga practice. Often, in the beginning, we can get caught into the trap of what we think a yogi is supposed look like. Bombarded with ideas of vegetarianism, brahmacharya and whatever else, there may be a sense of trying to fit into an ideal that resides outside ourself.

"Spiritual evolvement has little to do with being good and everything to do with being authentic."

(Take Me To Truth, by Nouk Sanchez & Tomas Vieira)

The more I delve into the varying degrees of philosphy and learning, I've come to the conclusion that it all begins and ends with practice. Through our own unique experience we meet our True self that shines through in a myriad of ways depending on the individual. As long as we do that, it's all good. From the practice, things have a way of shifting and changing. We may decide to eat differently, or approach relationships with others with more openness and understanding, all of which are born from connecting on the inside. Things come in, things fall away. When seeing more clearly we make better choices.

After years of practice, yes we may still get road rage, we may cuss, we may indulge in our vices, but the important part is that we continually be truthful with ourself, honoring what it is we are feeling and move forward with compassion, and vigilance, to that which keeps us clear and of service.

Even in our most irreverent moments we can find the reverent with whatever is, no judgment. It's in the judgment itself that holds us back and doesn't give us the opportunity to see clearly. No needing to get caught up in societal standards of where we are supposed to be in life, and how it is supposed to look, we then can live on our terms, while still staying connected to what is real. And that's freedom, my friends. Because really, yoga, the practice of yoga, is about union, connection, and from there liberation is born, revealed or even recognized.

When we tap into our inner freedom friends may not be comfortable with it, but we still must press on. Our family might think we're crazy, but so what, we can still be an example of love. When free of the conditions, life has new meaning, we're finally living.

The yoga path isn't about fulfilling some image, it's about fulfilling our own unique destiny. Being authentic. Simply being. It's doesn't take more than that, it doesn't need to, because nothing needs to be grasped for, it's already there, ready and waiting.

I can stand, strong and steady, aligning to the force that surrounds us, emanating through us, and then, everything start to flow.

Pincha Mayurasana

Notice how the camera shook when coming down into chaturanga dandasana, lol.

Bakasana B

I finally got around to doing a few videos for fun. Might as well since this is a yoga blog. Enjoy.

Low Maintenance

“The good life is inspired by love and guided by knowledge.”

(Bertrand Russell)

Besides drinking roobios tea like it's going out of style, this girl needs a haircut. Haha...sorry to report, but scissors haven't touched these tresses since last December. Whoa. Talk about taking low-maintenance to a new low, low, lol. When I got my last cut I was hanging out in Bangkok before heading to India. Yeah, I took a crap shoot, because as many know, I'm a curly head, and well, there aren't too many curly heads in Thailand, or all of Asia for that matter, and wow, I actually got a decent cut from a local hairdresser there. He just smiled, like most Thais do, and was like no problem, while inside he was probably like, wtf. Things like this really tickle me.

Anyway, even though I've let some things go to the way side, it's all good. I'll get myself pulled together soon enough. Haha. But really, I've learned how to scale back, I mean really scale back and simplify. Born out of necessity, I've thought to myself, why haven't I done it sooner anyway? The less I have, the more there is for the really good stuff. The less stimulus, the more I feel alive.

There's really something to this simplicity thing.

Humility

Cover of Take Me To Truth: Undoing the Ego

“Love, like truth and beauty, is concrete. Love is not fundamentally a sweet feeling; not, at heart, a matter of sentiment, attachment, or being “drawn toward.” Love is active, effective, a matter of making reciprocal and mutually beneficial relation with one’s friends and enemies.”

(Carter Heyward)



In the previous post I mentioned that my theme for the week was humility and balance (I know I'm totally geeking out, but love me anyway, lol). So, the book I'm currently reading has an awesome excerpt on humility that I thought I would share. I always have two books on tap, a non-fiction and a fiction, my non-fiction pick, Take Me To Truth, Undoing the Ego, by Nouk Sanchez & Tomas Vieira, is an amazing, in-depth read. Seriously, it drives so many nails on the head, it's unbelievable.

The Power of Humility

The Unified Self is an endless store of Higher Wisdom to which most of us have not yet yielded. It is a power house of Truth and knowledge beyond the finite intellectual realm because it is the direct receptor of the Source's miraculous intention. The more we undo the layers of ego-self perception, the stronger our capacity to extend and receive Love, Joy, Peace, insight, and understanding. Attack in any form is not part of the Unified Self's reality and neither is defense. Defense in itself is the belief that attack is real and therefore needs the counterattack of defense. The real and true self can never be attacked and therefore requires no defense.

The ego-self has so much invested in its image. These include ideas, beliefs, opinions, people, and things. It guards these intensely and is on the watch for any perceived threat of loss or change to any one of them, and so it uses defense as its resistance to change.

Humility contains the power of defenselessness. Only the ego-self needs to defend in order to uphold its insane thought system. Its total defense emerges when its identity is threatened by our possible discovery of the preposterous illusion that it is. Only illusion needs defending becuse if illusion of any kind were to completely withdraw defense, what would be left? If fear itself in all its guises withdrew all defenses, what would remain? Very simply, the only essence that could possibly remain once illusion is no longer protected is Love. The ego-release experienced is purely the setting down of defenses that have, until now, protected our illusions, all of them, including our ego-self image. Surrendering defenses means revealing and embracing Truth which is Love in action.

Ego-release would not be necessary if we could fully embrace true humility now. The ego-self is like an armed fortress, ready to battle against anyone of anything that threatens to de-stabilize its seat of power. We need to ask the questions, "What is our ego-self protecting?", and "What value lies in upholding such a gigantic illusion that blocks us from experiencing the ecstatic bliss of Love's presence?". If we surrendered wholeheartedly to the recognition that our most valuable asset is humility, we would become enlightened in this very instant. Both the intensity and duration of the ego-release experience would be diminished if we would only embrace humility.

We need to encourage conscious presence and extreme self-honesty to gain humility. It means eradicating the ego-self's desire to edit or justify our thought, feelings, and response in its favor, through consistent awareness. The key here is to maintain awareness while exercising discernment and not using judgment and condemnation, which foster guilt.

Our vulnerability is our strength when recognized from the Source's perspective. Not only can we afford to become more vulnerable, but we must become more vulnerable if we are to learn that ego-self defenses are meaningless and grow to trust the wisdom of Unified Will working through and around us. All the areas within us and in our life that we consciously or unconsciously defend are illusion! Our bodies, values, beliefs, and status are all illusion.

If we could only refrain from defending and hold present moment awareness with the intent of allowing Truth to unfold, we would gain insight and Peace. One more layer of illusion would be removed and we would gain yet another gigantic step forward to reclaiming our Unified Self and the blissful life for which we yearn.

(Take Me To Truth, Undoing the Ego, by Nouk Sanchez & Tomas Viera)

I love how the above excerpt explains that, vulnerability is our strength - this is something I'm chewing on at the moment, and goes directly opposite with much of what we hear today in media and political outlets (what a surprise, lol).

Vulnerability a strength, yes, I like this.

Want For Nothing

Free love? As if love is anything but free! Man has bought brains, but all the millions in the world have failed to buy love. Man has subdued bodies, but all the power on earth has been unable to subdue love. Man has conquered whole nations, but all his armies could not conquer love. Man has chained and fettered the spirit, but he has been utterly helpless before love. High on a throne, with all the splendor and pomp his gold can command, man is yet poor and desolate, if love passes him by. And if it stays, the poorest hovel is radiant with warmth, with life and color. Thus love has the magic power to make of a beggar a king. Yes, love is free; it can dwell in no other atmosphere.

(Emma Goldman)

I told my close friend and roommate today that somehow it felt strange to want for nothing at this moment. I mean, yes I would love to be in the same area code as my boyfriend, but we already know the wheels are in motion for that to happen...but, to be in a place feeling fully satisfied with the everyday, feeling as if nothing is missing, nor is there any urge I need to chase after is something new. Easily all this could change tomorrow, but damn it, it isn't often that I've felt this type of fullness.

These feelings have a tendency to change, but it's nice to get a taste of completeness. A realness is emerging. I'm feeling good in my own skin. It's priceless. I hope I can continue this practice by experiencing my essence instead of looking outward to feel whole.

We live in a culture where enough is never enough even though we have an abundance of everything. It seems to only perpetuate more consuming, we get more, we want more, and so on. I've definitely had this disease, and could never claim to be cured from it, more or less, now, when things such as this pop up, I'm more apt to take a look at what in me feels is lacking.

"Money never made a man happy yet, nor will it. The more a man has, the more he wants. Instead of filling a vacuum, it makes one." (Benjamin Franklin)

My days have been filled with early morning practice, studying Swedish, and teaching a yoga class a day. I've been reading like nobody's business, and have had an insatiable appetite for books dealing with various topics, the usual, life, love and perspectives on it all. What could be better? But really, my thirst has shifted toward learning, and deepening, and it's felt freeing to crave reading books versus craving more shoes, lol. Not that there is anything wrong with either.

Thanks to my roommate I'm eating some of the best food ever. She's taught me quite a bit regarding cooking, and Ayurveda, and I don't think I've ever felt this balanced before. It's been wonderful, and I'm soaking it all in. Yoga, pulse an optimal diet, mixed with feeding my mind and soul with good stuff, has culminated something in me that feels steady, and self-sustaining, so I'm rolling with it. (No T.V., that's a biggie) I know it sounds boring, but these routines I've implemented have done wonders. Once I start traveling again, I'm really gonna need to work on how to keep myself balanced, which shouldn't be a problem, things can always be worked out with a bit of planning.

My words for the coming week are balance and humility.

Ebb

“Love must be as much a light as it is a flame.”

(Henry David Thoreau)

I know I must bore readers about my path through the practice from time to time, by writing about working inward and such, but to be honest, it's a phase I'm going through and I just gonna honor it. It's how I work. There have been times in my life where I've been more outward with everything I do and say, and then there are times when I become more reflective, inward and contemplative. The best way to put it is there's a season for everything, ebbs and flows, and when I work with the current I simply feel better.

I've just come to a point where I feel the need to come from a place of cause versus coming from a place of effect, where I am constantly reacting to everything in life. When coming from a place of cause I choose to take responsibility for everything, and it's a practice that has been most challenging to date.

With keeping this practice in mind, I feel I've made steady changes in my perspective, thanks to the heightened awareness a yoga practice can bring. So, in turn, I question things, I contemplate, and I've become newly inspired by what I see, touch and feel. It's an interesting time, one of no huge outward changes that fascinate others, but a shift that lies deeply submerged within the recesses of my own heart and spirit.

I mean it isn't always easy, but of course it's quite simple, but the more I let go...let go of all of it...feeling defensive, offended, reactionary, less-than, lacking, hurt, etc...I feel more free.

New Moon

“I am like a falling star who has finally found her place next to another in a lovely constellation, where we will sparkle in the heavens forever”

(Amy Tan)

Esoterically speaking, the new moon is a time to take on new challenges, goals, changes, etc. Honestly, I've never been overly concerned with the effects of the moon, the waxing and waning, and all that stuff. My own menstrual cycle never seemed to jive with the moon all that much, either. However, when practicing Ashtanga yoga, this was the first time I ever took pause to honor the cycle of the moon, or at the very least, educate myself a bit more on what the cycles represented.

I guess it could be another thing not to concern yourself about, I mean I've always felt I did okay not really knowing, but on another note, when slowing myself down, and becoming more in tune with my own body, and it's rhythms, I've found it's a good thing to be aware of and it seems to happen naturally with time and practice.

With all that being said, I'm interested in playing around with the energy and taking a look at new challenges I'm ready to tackle.

“When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace.”

(Jimi Hendrix)

Are you taking your flaxseed oil? Okay, for all you yoga practitioners and health enthusiasts it's time to get hooked on flaxseed oil.

Here's a list of why I recommended taking 1-2 tbsp a day. Of course, added to an already healthy balanced diet makes sense. I personally use Barlean's, highest lignan flaxseed oil, 2 tbsp a day. And, no need to worry about the fat content, this type of oil is good for you, and your metabolism, unlike other fats.

• Helps protect the body against high-blood pressure, inflammation, water retention, and lowered immune function.

• Shortens recovery time for fatigued muscles after extertion.

• Increases stamina and energy.

• Accelerates healing of sprains and bruises.

• Eases weight loss in people afflicted with obesity.

• Stimulates brown fat cells and increases the metabolic rate making it easier to burn off fat.

• Improves liver function

• Helps relieve symptoms of PMS in woman.

• Strengthens finger and toenails. Promotes healthy skin and hair.

• Has been scientifically proven to treat some cases of depression.

• Protects against heart disease and reduces risk of cancer.

The list can go on and on, but don't take my word for it, do the research yourself, or Google it, lol - it's good stuff all the way.

Krishnamacharya Video

This is really an oldie. Amazing.