Integration

31.3.09


Photo by David Fredriksson

The world is a book and those who do not travel only read one page.

~ St. Augustine

After months in Mysore, practicing day in, day out, at the end, things start to click and come together. A cyclical motion we go through, all the while...evolving. (Hopefully...haha).

With intensity, a certain amount of unraveling happens in the practice...within ourselves. For, when we break into pieces we can build something stronger, more real. And, the interesting part is, this continually happens as we delve deeper and deeper...into the practice...into ourselves.

I love, when in the shala, the practice has nothing to do with fancy maneuvers one can acquire. Quite frankly, all that flash seems to bore Sharath and Sarawati to tears. There has to be more going on beneath the surface, because the asana is only the tool...not the end to the means. Yes. Things come together with practice, but are only the by product when connecting to a deeper state of Grace.

With each unraveling new fears have a way of presenting themselves. New challenges are faced. And naturally, old stuff maybe I haven't faced yet are there, too. It's crazy how we can become fearful...but there comes a time to take a look at it. We need to be shaken up. We need the unraveling. We need to shed the old skin to expand into something new, and more profound. Why stagnate?

I've had to take a look at the darkness that burrows within. I've had to face it. Feelings of unworthiness, loneliness, and disconnection can be frightening places. But truth be told, these feeling are lies and must be released. No matter how far away from the light we think we are, we cannot escape the beauty of our essential make up. It may take a millennium to realize, but will catch up with us, no matter what. So why live the illusion any longer?

As my trip to Mysore comes to a close, I'm amazed. A new sense of integration has come into play. The pieces have been rearranged, and have come together. Not always an easy process, but necessary, nonetheless. Yes. Our minds can play crazy tricks on us. Oh. How easy it is to grasp onto what we think we know. Yes. How scary and challenging it can be to open up to what it is we don't know. Again, another practice to embrace.

Even though I still have a ways to go, tacking this internal journey has never felt more exciting than it does for me in this moment.

This is where the juice is.

With the stillness of each moment, the breath of life is always there. Patiently waiting. No need to doubt any longer. How can I ever be separate from that which I am made?

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