Days and Weeks


"Whatever satisfaction come from getting what the false-self wants, is always brief."

(Father Thomas Keating)

The days and weeks since moving to Stockholm have passed by in a flash. Almost in an accelerated fashion. Which is strange, crazy, and perplexing at the same time. Unbelievably, I'm picking up words everyday. My Swedish has a long way to go. The combination of doing my Rosetta Stone program, mixed with roaming about in public, hearing conversations, and such, has really made a difference. This is something I wanna hit out of the ballpark. Learning a new language. Gotta dust off the lazy English speaking stigma and work it. Being a native English speaker is tough in that it's so easy to fall into the trap of not trying to learn another language. Nope, that's not the route I choose to take. I'm finding speaking new words, having fun with it, is unexpectedly enjoyable. A welcome challenge. Who would have thought? Already have my sights set on learning French and Italian. Also, picking up where I left off with my Spanish studies. Whooo, and Mandarin. That be fun. Hahahaha. Okay. Let's take it one step at a time. Silly me.

Well. Fortunately, I've been able to maintain the rhythm of my practice with the move. No problem. Helps to have a great practice partner, I can't deny. A wonderful thing to have when used to practicing on one's own like I have, for as long as I have. Thankfully, the cold weather hasn't had much of an affect. That being, Swedish buildings are well insulated. And when outside, I don't mess around. I layer up.

I've been consciously honing in on striking a balance between effort and surrender. Often I find the effort is in showing up. When showing up, there is much surrender to be had. To be handed over. To be given. Often there are places for me to let go, and soon, I find there is even more to let go of. How could that be as the practice progresses to places more challenging? It's interesting. I play with the dynamic, and to my amazement, the greater the challenge, the greater the letting go. Especially with embarking into 3rd Series, it's unbelievable how much softening needs to take place within the effort and strength that comes into play with each asana.

I've come to the realization that it's time to no longer hold back. It goes deeper than the mere play of asana. A wise teacher of mine once told me, over and over again, "you're holding yourself back." And, within the holding back, I was often told I need to soften as well. Soften. In every way. Finally, after all this time, I see why. I see why it's become an important focus.

It's an exciting time. A time of transformation and manifestation. As this year comes to a close, I've never felt more ready to step into what it is I've always known I was meant to be. It goes beyond labels, status, and wants.

My heart wants to sing, and I no longer want to hinder it's song.

9 Insightful Comments:

Claudia said...

Yes, an exciting time of manifestation, sounds like a moment to savor and enjoy. Glad to hear the Rosetta Stone is working out for you and you are having fun with it. My boyfriend is trying to learn Spanish and we were wondering about it...

By the way, I liked your post about the institute in Mysore with videos on how to build up to backbends, thank you!, I posted a link to it in my blog and said thank you again!, I will be trying it going forward, see if I can finally drop back.

Have a good evening. Claudia

Anonymous said...

Oh Sweden. I lived there for fourteen months…played basketball for Kersher. I like Sweden. And I’m not concerned for how long will take to come there again. Why hurry? This path is a unique labyrinth of tunnels, chambers, follies and surprises created in a four acres garden of my heart. I skilfully escaped from the temple of the underworld, avoided the eyes made of needles, shut down a huge pyramid made of translucent emptiness, criss-cross the paths and passages that lead nowhere, and succeeded to turn myself to extraordinary statues of Stockholm - at every turn there were decisions to make and tricks to avoid. This is a day out with a difference which will challenge and delight generations to come.

Peaceloveyoga said...

Claudia, I LOVE Rosetta Stone, I would recommend it to anyone! A great way to start learning a language.

Glad to hear you liked the video on dropping back.


Thanks, Zee!

Anonymous said...

You are welcome. Now, we are all stuck in the pre-Christmas snow. No more comments.

Anonymous said...

...well, pre-Christmas snow is a metaphor for “as long as it takes” and not THAT snow. Just to clear any possible confusion. Colder climate is nothing for ashtanga yogis. ;)

Helen said...

Hi, It's my first time here, came in from someone elses yogablog. I just have to say -WoW, how beatiful you put it, about effort and surrender! I have the same feeling, just didnt put in words :-) Good luck with learning Swedish and the singing of the heart. /a yogini from Gothenburg

Helen said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Peaceloveyoga said...

Greetings Helen from Gothenburg! Haven't made it to your city yet! Would like to visit sometime. Yes, I'm really enjoying the Swedish language, and learning bit by bit, everyday.


Helen said...

You should come here sometime, maybee not today cause we have snow and fog at the same time!? This is a nice city and the pace here is different from Stockholm. Stockholm is a Beauty, Gothenburg is Friendly. Here´s my shalas website.
Nice reading, your blog!


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