The Alchemy of Desire

21.1.09



Just picked up this book today at Ashok Bookstore. There's nothing like reading a book set in the country you're in. Good stuff.

Throat Chakra

20.1.09

Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize nothing is lacking, the whole world belongs to you.

~ Lao Tzu



Beginning over the summer there's been a progression of energy moving through out my body. I guess it's premature to say moving...because more times than not, it gets stuck. After seeing the Daoist in Taiwan for a period, the stuck energy in the low back moved...but moved, getting locked into my upper back. Hahaha. What to do, what to do? Well, he helped me work out the stuck energy in the upper back, to later feel as if the energy was stewing in my neck. Crazy. In November and December I had some major neck issues for sure. However, after some rest and practice in the shala, the neck pain disappeared. There's still something going on with my throat chakra because when the discomfort in my neck dissipated I came down with a soar throat that lasted for about a week which soon came with dry cough. Awesome! (not really).

Now, I've got throat chakra issues to contend with...

You see, it comes down to this...

The issue comes from not expressing my needs. Not being able to set boundaries. Not feeling comfortable with illustrating what it is I want. Not knowing when to say enough is enough.

I've been put into situations where I do my best to practice compassion and care...to then, find that I've poured my whole self into someone or something to then have forgotten about myself on a deep level.

So, the process has started. A lie that I've held close needs to die.

No more.

It is time to be free of it.

Honoring MLK

19.1.09






Everybody can be great. Because anybody can serve. You don’t have to have a college degree to serve. You don’t have to make your subject and your verb agree to serve…. You don’t have to know the second theory of thermodynamics in physics to serve. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love.


~ Martin Luther King, Jr. on the power of service.




Since being in India, I am more convinced than ever before, that the method of non-violent resistance is the most potent weapon available to oppressed people in their struggle for justice and human dignity.


~
Martin Luther King, Jr. speaking on his trip to India.



On this day I've come to a place where I'm left asking the question...How can I serve? Instead of following every want and desire that comes my way, why not focus on adding value instead of taking, all the while, still listening and fulfilling my own heart.

An interesting and exciting place to be.



Form and Formless

18.1.09





Wow. So, I've been neglecting my blog since arriving to Mysore. Amazing how easy one can get carried away with the flow of life here.

It's all good.

Now that I've come back down to earth, it will be nice to continue writing everyday, and proceed with a few other projects in my spare time. I relented and rented a scooter. Crazy. I once read that driving in India isn't about skill, it's about reflexes. Ummm, yeah...I couldn't agree more. Good thing I had practice zipping around in a scooter in Taiwan first before attempting it in Mysore. There're many factors to take into account. For one, I must constantly remind myself to drive on the left side of the road versus the right. Then, being able to maneuver around the various modes of transport and animals can be a challenge. Cows have free range. There are even herds of goat to be careful of. So, if I can make it here, I can make it anywhere...right? Haha.

Practice has been amazing. Being back in the shala gives more than I could ask for. Extraordinary. As I breath in and out, I'm discovering the importance of letting go in each stance of the practice. The more I let go, the more I line up. Freedom is found. Energy is released, not grasped for.

As I delve deeper and deeper I consciously connect to the force that beats my own heart. Do I connect to doing or being? Questions to continuously ask.

Yes. We see form. But, we feel the formless. The more I enter in, the larger the formless reality becomes. Will I truly understand? No. Probably not, for it's a mystery. Being an embodiment of this reality has been the ultimate challenge as of late. Sometimes I wonder if I will ever break through as I stand on the edge, starring down toward vast nothingness. God, how I want to jump without a care in the world. Just don't know if I'm there yet.

Sankranti Festival

16.1.09





















Moon Days

11.1.09

Gotta love moon days. A time for rest. A time for reflection. A time for sleeping in late when used to rising before the sun. Funny. Sleeping in is 7 am. Sad, but true.

Actually, I wouldn't want it any other way.

Wow. It feels great to be back in Mysore. When I first got here I had to ask...Why? Once settled, I totally understood.

Finally, I'm living. Living for today. The past is over. Even though some may try to suck me back in. To old hurt. To old pain. I feel I've come into a place of greater strength and acceptance. With everything, accepting what each moment brings has much to teach. No running. No trying to make something happen. Through it all, grace has a way of unfolding.

Grace. It's here. It's now.

With each step I take. I've come into a place of utter disbelief. Awe. That there is no place I would rather be. There is no other state I would rather be in. Life is full of tiny breakthroughs. Tiny miracles that reaffirm my faith.

Wonderful.

Love

10.1.09

"...love is the Divine Mystery. Love cannot be controlled. It cannot be predicted. It cannot be enforced. It cannot be enslaved. It cannot be killed. It cannot be defined. If you would speak of the depth, the power, and the infinite genius of love, think upon its ability to end all duality. Love has no opposites. It cannot be captured, and yet it willingly serves. It is infinitely free, and yet it abides in captivity. It cannot be enforced, and yet it is the basis of all law. It is the bringer of truth, and yet it never judges. It is the seer of all things, and yet it never condemns. It conquers by surrendering. It rules by lifting up. Through its mastery of paradox, love ends all duality."

~ Love without End, by Glenda Green


In the game of love there are no winners and losers. The gift is in the act. Selfless. No need for expectation in receiving something in return. I will never regret loving someone. Never. Like everything I decide to do in life. I do it with my whole heart.

That is what breathes life into me. That is what feeds my soul like no other.

On the outside it may look as if something is lost. But how could this be? Never. As my heart breaks, then finally the light can shine through.

Throw me into the Fire

9.1.09

Right. So, it's been about a week since I've been in Mysore, India...and somehow it's felt like a month. Haha. I exaggerate. Anyway. With a weeks worth of lead primary, I'm looking forward for some mysore practice action. However, I'll be starting the week with a lead 2nd series class on Monday. Hmmmm. My body maybe be ready, but my mind...that's another story. The whole mental game is a challenge.

Being back feels great. This go around I know where most things are...I know the drill. However, there's always more to discover and new people to meet. So. Interesting times...and well, it all comes down to the practice. Nothing beats practicing in the shala. Nothing. A culmination of tradition, and energy makes for an amazing ride.

Yes. The ride. As I leave the shala every morning all thoughts and worries regarding asana are set aside. Then, time to remind myself what the real practice is about. On this day will I practice compassion?

Yes. Important stuff to contemplate all the while being able to laugh at it all.

Settling in has been fairly easy. I have two roommates. Tiffany and Giancarlo. We rented out a 3 bedroom aprartment, with a washer. Score! And, it's clean. Two things high on the priority list.

Tomorrow rest. Sunday, moonday...nice!!!

Gossip

5.1.09

Those who know don’t talk. Those who talk don’t know. Close your mouth, block off your senses, blunt your sharpness, untie your knots, soften your glare, settle your dust. This is the primal identity. Be like the Tao. It can’t be approached or withdrawn from, benefited or harmed, honored or brought into disgrace. It gives itself up continually. That is why it endures.

~ The Tao Te Ching



Interesting. Arriving to Mysore, I found that I've been the topic of idle gossip. I find it funny that those who talk, know nothing about me, and are way of base when it comes to the truth. At first it made me angry. But after some time I've decided to take it as a learning opportunity on how words can destroy others, and that I shouldn't participate in idle gossip as much as I can help it. Of course, this will be challenging. However, I've learned there is always more to the story.

Often when listening to others it only illustrates their own character versus the character of those they are gossiping about.

So, it all comes down to letting go. Things like this will continue to happen, and I'm fine with it. I can't worry about what others decide to say, I can only be vigilant regarding my own actions and how it affects others.

In the past year I've been put in situations where I did the best I could with what knew at the time. I decided to take the fall for something, when in turn, I was only trying to help someone in need. I don't need to explain further for only those important to me know the truth. It all comes down to intention. With that being said there are no regrets.

Every moment has something to teach. As I move forward, hopefully I'll be better for it.


Mysore, India - Part 2

3.1.09

It's been a bit crazy. I'm a little jet lagged, but I'm here, for my 2nd experience in Mysore, India. Whew! When do we practice?!

The buzz is it's gonna be extremely crowded in the shala. We'll see. I've learned that you can't always believe what you hear. Anyway, I managed to register yesterday so looks like I'm good to go for tomorrow when the shala resumes yoga practice after a two week break. My first standing forward bend is gonna be a rude awakening after all the traveling in the past week. Eek! I'll be surprised if my back will even be able to bend. Let the adventures begin. :)

Never thought I would've been able to make it back this soon. So, with that being said, I feel a huge sense of gratitude. Thank you.

Don't care where I was yesterday or last year. No thoughts on tomorrow. No expectations.

Eyes wide open. There's no better way to live or experience.

Alex Grey's Take on Obama

Happy New Year

1.1.09

As we speak I'm sitting in the Bangkok airport waiting to embark to India. Can't believe it. It's gonna be a long night. However, I want to wish everyone a joyous New Year. Wishing everyone a year filled with blessings and laughter!!

Getting ready to board...

:)

Sita Sings The Blues



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