Listen

"The very fact that you are a seeker means you want to know the Power behind the universe. You want to unearth the mysterious laws behind events. You want to understand the independent joy that you come across every now and then. Think of a time when, all of a sudden, you were happy. You didn't go anything to make yourself happy, but you were happy. This happiness is called svayambhu, spontaneous. It is self-born joy. As a seeker you want to know what causes this."


~excerpt from, The Yoga of Discipline, by Gurumayi




Damp, cold, and chilly once again this morning...the meditative tapping of the rain against my bedroom window made me want to stay in bed, all cozy and warm. I wrestled with staying there for a moment. But, somehow, my desire to practice won out in the end, and I got myself out of bed. I always have to revert back to how I feel during, and after practice, to keep myself motivated. At this moment in my life I rely on daily discipline. Its an important part of keeping me focused, and clear headed...

Still maneuvering around my little muscle strain...its no big deal really, just something to be aware of, and obviously I don't want to make it worse. So, I backed off on third series, regulating only to several postures after 2nd series. Its all good...I need to feel its ok to give myself a break from time to time. Its about healing, its about wholeness...

Realized that some of my studies, as of late, put me in a bit of a frenzy. At times, I have the tendency to want to absorb too much all at once. Kind of like the saying goes...trying to drink from a fire hose. I need to scale back a bit. Take sips, let it sit in my mouth, and then swallow. Like tasting a fine wine. Thats better...and the experience is much sweeter to begin with. If I don't give myself the chance to sit with my questions, before moving on to the next, I will be left confused, and a bit overwhelmed. I can't deny my curiosity. Its something I've had for as long as I can remember. At my father's annoyance...I always had vast questions about God, life, and religion. I've always had that thirst...and well, I really don't know what I'm trying to say here, but, its an interesting time. I'm finally listening...really listening...