Tony Robbins

Give. Nice, reminder.

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus

Don't know about you, but I'm looking forward to seeing this film. Heath Ledger, Johnny Depp, and Jude Law are a some of my favorite actors.

Ganesha Sharanam

Ganesha Sharanam Sharanam Ganesha
Gan Gan Ganapati Sharanam Ganesha
Jay Ganesha Jaya Jaya Gananatha


Ganesha is the elephant-headed god, son of Shiva and Parvati. "Gana" means troops or multitudinous spiritual attendants of Shiva, and "isha" means Lord, so Ganesha is the "Lord of the troops." Ganesha is the remover of obstacles and is always invoked at the beginning of any endeavor. He also represents the earth element - the root chakra - which needs to be solid before we can fly. Ganapati and Gananatha are two other neames of Ganesha. "Pati" means Lord or protector, and "natha" means Lord, so Ganesha, Ganapati, and Gananatha really mean the same thing: "Lord of the troops."

Sharanam means refuge, protection.

Gan Gan is part of the bija, or seed mantra of Ganesh. This core sound doesn't carry discursive meaning. Bija mantra are said to contain the essence of the deity. I seek refuge in Ganesha. Please protect me, oh great Elephant.

(Written by Jai Uttal)

Kirtan

Chanting the many names or mantras of the Gods and Goddesses - is perhaps the most important technique in Bhakti yoga. Although the practice itself is very simple, the internal process that it stimulates is vast and mysterious. Externally, we're just singing repetitive songs with simple melodies and a few Sanskrit words. We're asked to try to put our analytical minds to the side (easier said than done), and sing from our hearts. We're told that whatever emotion we're feeling, even anger, can be passionately channeled into the song. We're told that it doesn't matter the slightest bit what our voices sound like. Then the magic happens. Walls constructed long ago come crumbling down. Wounds that we never knew were there begin to heal. Long submerged emotions, both joy and sorrow, come to the surface to be offered up into the chant. And somehow, effortlessly, we move into a meditative state that creates a safe, calm haven for the flower of the heart to unfold. Whether or not we understand the meanings of the words, these chants become vessels to carry our deepest unspoken prayer to the infinite soul of God.

One of the amazing things about Kirtan as a practice is that it welcomes any mood or emotional condition. We can sing softly, like a mother to her baby. We can sing sensually, as if to a lover. And we can sing with powerful energy of an angry warrior. Our whole being is offered. Whoever we are at any given time, whether happy or sad, shining with light or hidden in darkness, our prayers are perfect in the eyes of unconditional love.

Finally, one who embraces the path of Bhakti very quickly stops doing these practices to get anything or feel anything. Rather, the Kirtan becomes an outpouring of love and emotion to the beloved, and unburdening, an offering. I feel, when I sing, my connection to my guru, my longing to be closer, and my gratitude for His unending grace. Truly, the essence of Bhakti is surrender, offering our individual selves to the great ocean of pure consciousness, gently resting in the loving embrace of the Divine Mother, saying, "Not my will, but Thy will be done."

(Written by Jai Uttal)

Meditation

Discipline

When you hear "discipline," what do you usually think of? It may evoke a feeling of rigidity inside. It may connote enforcement or obligation. Everything we do with this concept of "discipline" feels like a job, but in truth it isn't. The literal translation of discipline is, "to have the capacity to discover something new about oneself." I think that's a better way to interpret discipline. The hardest part of any practice is to show up. When you stand on your Yoga mat, you're in a space of openness to discover something new. Niyama means the ability to come back to your practice again and again, without force or rigidity. Approaching life this way will invoke a totally different energy than the usual mechanical approach.

(Anthony "Prem" Carlisi)

I really enjoy Prem Carlisi's approach toward the meaning of discipline. If anything, coming to the mat with an air of discovery is more fun than the alternative - becoming trapped into feeling like there is somewhere to be in the practice, or as if something needs to be attained - brings heaviness to it. Why take the joy out of the process?

Finding a balance between disciplined effort and non-attachment is an interesting dynamic to play with. It's amazing how things open and expand when no longer confined by the tangle the mind put us in. Hence, a reason to practice.

Always having a wild imagination, and active mind, I've learned how it can either stifle or set me free. It feels good to have tools to perceive more clearly. Not that I always get it right, but really, I guess the point isn't to get it right. Right? Just opening the mind, setting aside filters of past and future aside, is enough for now.

I've never been good at spiritual banter, and honestly, I'm happy not to be, because sometimes it's best not to verbalize what the heart can only know. Through practice, I enter the spaciousness of my heart, and learn to speak it's language. Silence. The silent hum of perfect fulfillment - the feeling of being embraced by an unknown/knowable force, that vibrates, pulsates, and buzzes with nothing more I can explain, but unspeakable LOVE.

I may not be the most eloquent when expressing all the inner workings of the mind, yoga, spirituality, and life, but at the end of the day, I ask myself ... Have I loved deeply? Have I been of service? Have I added value to those around me? Feels like some good stuff to start with.

It makes all that discipline worthwhile. That's for sure.

Theory Class with KPJ

KPJ in Encinitas, California, 1987.

Advanced Series - Old School Style

Practitioners include: Chuck Miller, Gary Lopedota, Clifford Sweate & Tim Miller. 1987.

Love this!!

Ashtanga Yoga Standing Sequence

"The unreal is more powerful than the real, because nothings is as perfect as you can imagine it. Because it's intangible ideas, concepts, beliefs, fantasies, that last. Stone crumbles. Wood rots. People, well, they die, but things are as fragile as a thought, a dream, a legend, they can go on forever."

(Chuck Palahniuk)

Getting/Giving

"When you know that there is enough, you stop competing with others. You stop competing for love, or money, or sex, or power, or whatever it is you felt there was not enough of. The competition is over.

This alters everything. Now, instead of competing with others to get what you want, you being to give what you want away. Instead of fighting for more love, you being giving more love away. Instead of struggling for success, you begin making sure that everyone else is successful. Instead of grasping for power, you begin empowering others.

Instead of seeking affection, attention, sexual satisfaction, and emotional security, you find yourself being the source of it. Indeed, everything that you have ever wanted, you are now supplying to others. And the wonder of it all is that, as you give, so do you receive. You suddenly have more of whatever you are giving away.

The reason for this is clear. It has nothing to do with the fact that what you have done is 'morally right,' or 'spiritually enlightened,' or the 'Will of God.' It has to do with a simple truth: There is no one else in the room.

There is only one of us."

(Neale Donald Walsh)

Autumn

The leaves are falling, falling as if from far up,
as if orchards were dying high in space.
Each leaf falls as if it were motioning “no.”

And tonight the heavy earth is falling
away from all other stars in the loneliness.

We’re all falling. This hand here is falling.
And look at the other one. It’s in them all.

And yet there is Someone, whose hands
infinitely calm, holding up all this falling.

(Rainer Maria Rilke)


The fall is always such a special time for me in Columbus. Really. This is the best time of year in the heartland. I guess you can say I love times of transition. In the fall there is a falling away. A Coziness. A briskness.

Change is nice.

Is it Enough?

"The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen"

(Elizabeth Kubler Ross)

Asana. Meditation. Chanting. Vegetarianism. Ayurveda. And so on ...

Is it enough? Is it enough to do these practices and call it a day? Well, in my opinion, not really. These practices have benefited me greatly. More than I can describe. But also, I've learned that the practices alone can't make up my identity. Simply put, they are tools, and tools only.

With that being said, a tool is a tool, and how we decide to use them is key. I can use the tool to further inflate my ego, or I can use it to deflate it.

One thing I've observed over the years, being a student, and a teacher, is how when introducing these practices, an awakening starts to take place no matter what. It sneaks up, like a thief in the night. When this happens, some embrace transformation, some run. I've gone through a whole slew of this within myself, and no matter what one decides to do, embrace or run, I've learned to honor the process and readiness of the practitioner. Most of all, relinquishing judgments I put on myself and others.

What is gained? Well, nothing. Through the above practices we begin to uncover, unravel, and reveal, and that can manifest in a whole slew of ways. There is no "external" yogic image to live up to, and believe me, I've had to discover this in many capacities. The freeing part came when I deeply realized that through it all, I yearned to truthfully discover myself. Unaltered. Whole. Innocent.

Once able to step out of societal standards, expectations, and living up to an image that wasn't my own, then and only then, was when I began to breathe. However, often where we loose sight is in replacing one identity for another. If anything, I've learned to take pause when I feel as if I'm holding on too tightly to a certain identity structure.

As I continue these practices, and deepen, they have a way of wiping a dirty mirror clean. I see more clearly. Everyday, I wipe it clean. I come out of my head, into my heart, presence enters in, getting down to the root ...

Awareness.

I love how Judith Orloff states that the mind sees only 10%, while the intuition sees 100%. Our bodies are an intuitive channel, and through yoga we can be better equipped with tuning in.

But what from there? Obviously it isn't enough just to be aware. I'm entering into a new phase of my life.

How and where can I be of service? I'm strongly feeling the value of adding value to those around me and beyond. It isn't about just me anymore, and the answer is that it never was.

I may not always get it right, but I'm setting the intention. I'm asking for guidance on this matter. For once in my life I relinquish control from the matter.

Let's see what develops ...

Schools Killing Creativity?

I can so identify with this talk. Profoundly moving. Deeply Insightful. Inspiring. Funny.

B.K.S. Iyengar

Transformation has to take place!!!
Direct. Simple. Fierce. Love it.

Nakedness

"My life is like a stroll on the beach…as near to the edge as I can go."

(Thoreau)

Naked. Living without life's pretenses. Living who you are, in every moment, truthfully ... and, being okay with it. Ha. Being more than okay with it. Loving it. Fully and completely.

Experiencing what I'm NOT on almost every level, has really gotten me touch with who I am. It's never been easy, and actually the excavation process has often been painful. There have been times I've been forced to let go, there have been times I let go on my own accord. In both instances, everything happened when I was ready. Sometimes you need a push, sometimes you shove, a delicate balance, and ultimately it comes down to surrendering to the force and intelligence behind everything.

Now, I've come to a place where I see the beauty, and fear in standing naked in every moment and encounter. Naked, meaning, not hiding behind, external labels, status symbols, or defenses. Including, past pains, hurts and/or judgments. Can I look to each moment with the clarity and innocence of a child? Can I be vulnerable, and truthful with ALL of my feelings, and not be ashamed for the 'supposed' repercussions for it? I ask myself this.

It's amazing how we get comfortable hiding in the dark. Hiding behind all that inflates our false reality. Our false perception. Our false identity. We may continue to feed the falseness, but no amount of numbing will help heal the emptiness that is felt in this space. Thank God for living, and learning ... for living, and learning, and learning ... and living, and learning. It's a constant process, never ending.

Hopefully, as I move through life the learning process will become an upward spiral. Coming full circle, to end where I started, to now have a broader perspective, a new set of eyes, a new found clarity.

Being naked is looking at things for what they are. No more, no less. Can I look beyond the 'story' and see what is truly real? Can I look beyond what I think needs to happen? Can I look beyond how I feel things should be?

Ultimately, can I stand in the present moment, and just be there in all my stripped down glory, and smile with what is?

I've been asked, why do you do what you do? Feel the way you do? Done what you have done?

Some days, I don't have an answer. Some days, I often ask myself the same thing, but it's come to the point where I can NOT do what I do, because I'm haunted by it, I'm enthralled and burned to the core from the inside out, and once there is a taste, one can never go back. The calling is always there it is all in the matter of when we choose to listen.

Rumi

All day I think about it, then at night I say it.
Where did I come from, and what am I supposed to be doing?
I have no idea.
My soul is from elsewhere, I'm sure of that,
and I intend to end up there.
This drunkenness began in some other tavern.
When I get back around to that place,
I'll be completely sober. Meanwhile,
I'm like a bird from another continent, sitting in the aviary.
The day is coming when I fly off,
but who is it now in my ear who hears my voice?
Who says words with my mouth?
Who looks out with my eyes? What is the soul?
I cannot stop asking.
If I could taste one sip of an answer,
I could break out of this prison for drunks.
I didn't come here of my own accord, and I can't leave that way.
Whoever brought me here will have to take me home.
This poetry. I never know what I'm going to say.
I don't plan it.
When I'm outside the saying of it,
I get very quiet and rarely speak at all.

(Rumi)

The Pre-Dawn Hour

"In love with life, my soul lives the subtlest of passions, lives like a gypsy, each day a different house, each night under the stars."

(Rumi)

Since being back in Columbus I found myself slowly practicing later and later. When I say late, it may seem a bit odd that getting up at dawn was late for me. But, no matter, I noticed the difference in the energy versus getting up in the pre-dawn hours, and I have to say, my inner clock was gently telling me to get up earlier to practice.

Didn't take much adjusting on my part. Getting to bed the same time every evening was key. No problem.

There is nothing like the energy and silence felt during this time. I love it. I relish it. It's almost as if a subtle current is supporting me, like being held in the palm of someone's hand. The mind is quiet, the energy steady, sustaining, I start slow, and end spent, in a good way.

Two hours before dawn are known as bramhamuhurta, in Sanskrit, "the time divine." Or as Certified Ashtanga yoga teacher, Anthony Carlisi states, the "nectar hours," referring to the transition from darkness to the light just before the dawn. There seems to be a subtle sweetness at this time, and I laugh at myself at how shocking it is to say it. If asked if this would be an enjoyable time to be up 5 years ago, I would've gave a simple, hell no. But the more I practice, the more external stimuli drop away, and I come to appreciate the cycles of nature, and the energetic rhythms and pulsations of the earth. This unexpectedly crept into my consciousness and has pleasantly surprised me along the path.

With all that being said, when sharing with new practitioners, I always refer to what David Swenson says, "the best time to practice is, when you can practice." Very true. I find that often, in the beginning, we have a built in structure in place, and the simple showing up when we can, is an awesome place to start. Then, with willingness, and the opportunity to turn down the volume of the monkey mind, we can tune in. Tune in to our essential self. Stripped down. Bare. This can be scary at first, but ultimately it is something we must all face.

Being truly present at this time is better than anything. Why seek other forms of entertainment when sitting in a space of peacefulness? It doesn't get any better. It simply doesn't.

The Strong Life Test for Women

Some Not So Random Links

"The truth will set you free. But first, it will piss you off."

(Gloria Steinem)

Following are several links that might be of interest for those of you out there. Hope you enjoy, or find something useful.

Sounds True: Insights to the Edge - A series of podcasts facilitated by Tami Simon, founder and publisher of Sounds True, where she dialogues with visionaries, teachers, writers, and thought leaders. Worth checking out for a dose of inspiration, or simply an opportunity to open to a broader perspective. You can find many talks in the Achieves, as well.

MAGIC GHEE!? - Order Ghee that's made from grass-fed cows and only prepared on the new and full moon. Awesome. Also, learn more about this sattvic wonder food!

Remembering Sri K. Pattabhi Jois - A touching article on Guruji. Worth the read.

Little Moon Essentials - I'm really becoming a fan of their products. I especially like "Ass Kisser." You'll have to see for yourself what that's all about. ;-)

Love Print - Okay, I'm going out on a limb ... but, this seems like a really cute gift idea!

Penzu - An online journal, that's secure. Daily journal writing is a great way to strengthen intuition, and unload unwanted garbage that litters the mind. I've really enjoyed making daily entries.