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"A quiet mind is all you need. All else will happen rightly, once your mind is quiet. As the sun on rising makes the world active, so does self-awareness affect changes in the mind. In the light of calm and steady self-awareness inner energies wake up and work miracles without effort on your part." - Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj


Recently, finally, I checked my blog stats and was shocked to learn that my post regarding the Blue Lagoon is the top post of ALL time. Not only that, but it's the most visited post for every single week thus far. So much for my brilliant blogs about yoga! Hahaha, only kidding. Blue Lagoon you ask? Well, it's this magical place in the fascinating country of Iceland. I had the pleasure of teaching yoga there over a year ago and visiting the Blue Lagoon was part of my experience. It seems just mentioning the place peaks the interest of many out in cyber space. It's like, wow! I had no idea it would be such a draw. No less, the main reason for most of the traffic to this site. Sigh. This is really motivating me to get cracking, posting more regularly. This can't continue to be my most popular blog post ever! No. Although, my life isn't too exciting at the moment. Which, to tell you the truth, I'm happy with. I'm loving my routine.

We're already over 6 months in since starting our Mysore program. It's been great, and mostly the reason why I've been absent. I'm working with a tight schedule, especially after teaching for nearly four hours and doing my own practice before hand it's already nearly a full day. When putting in and then giving out, I've had to re-establish a balance for myself.

In the beginning it takes a substantial amount of energy and now things are beginning to take shape in a way that's really astounding. All it takes is commitment. Students want to know you'll be there. A relationship is born. A beautiful give and take and growth begins to take shape. There is no better formula then consistency. When working in this way it still blows me away how amazing this practice is. It works, truly, with the right amount of attention and care. Building slowly. Breath centered.

It's important for me to keep an open dialogue with students as they develop through their practices. I'm the type of teacher who enjoys listening to feedback when practitioners start to gain insights and attune to their bodies and minds. In that, I trust the practice in a way that I don't have to say too much because I know in time it will be there for them. Keeping them on track within the practice has a way of already removing the barriers. I am fascinated by it. I know other forms of yoga rely on an abundance of dialogue which can be beneficial from time to time. However, more often then none, I feel there really isn't anything new, so to speak. The yogis of old knew what needed to be uncovered through experience and the practical methods to take us there. Sometimes I feel we have complicated what is unnecessary to complicate. It's all so clear, is it not? Reveling in the mystery. I realize this being a recent phenomenon, in that yoga has become a billion dollar business globally. This motivates me to continue to peel back the layers and remove the exterior packaging and get down to the root. Namasté.

Iceland Inspiration

Inspired by Iceland Video from Inspired By Iceland on Vimeo.

I couldn't resist. I had to post this. Once again more amazing scenery of Iceland and pretty funny too.

Bless, Bless {Goodbye Iceland}

"Bless, bless." How Icelanders say goodbye.

Time moved by so quickly my last week in Iceland I didn't even get a chance to write all that I wanted to. Ahhh. It's crazy. The Midnight Sun! The financial crises! The recent election in Reykjavik! Pool etiquette. Baby carriages parked outside coffee shops with babies in them! Too much to write, too little time ... and most importantly, the wonderful students at Yoga Shala Reykjavik.

What a blur. Already back in Stockholm, I felt the past week pass at lightening speed. Lots to do. Getting settled. Cooking again. When the plane touched down in Arlanda International it honestly felt like coming home. A welcome surprise, for it's still a new place for me in many instances. Everything completely green and fresh. All the trees!!! It was like I had seen them for the first time in my life. Trees are the one thing Iceland does not have very much of. I was in sensory overload I tell you. Sensory overlooooad. The trees and greenery of Sweden during this time of year truly make it special.

I'll tell ya though, Iceland did a number on me in a good way. I don't even know how to explain it. Even my boyfriend has told me over and over again how it feels as if I've changed or shifted. It was a combination of many things. This is my sense. There's a current of energy that courses through Iceland like no other place I've been. I felt it then. I feel it now. One must step out of the environment to feel the affect. I know I'll go back. I'd love to see more of the country. Mystical. Mysterious. Alive with energy. There isn't quite anything like it. I know. I know. I've said this many times, but it's true! My experience there will continue to live in my heart for a long time to come.

The next day back in Stockholm I attended the very last day of the Peter Sanson Workshop at Yoga Shala, Stockholm. What a treat. Peter Sanson, certified by Sri K. Pattabhi Jois, and relatively unknown is many circles, and very known in others, is yoga teaching at it's very best. He doesn't seem to partake in marketing when it comes to teaching, and does it all in a sincere, quiet manner balanced with utmost attention and intensity. What a lovely human being. Truly humble, low-key, unassuming, and totally devoted. This is the energy I crave in a teacher.

Starting day one of his Ashtanga Yoga practice with Guruji, he has steadily continued keeping it real, by living it in his heart. You can't help but feel it. There's no sense of showiness. Nothing. I felt myself wishing I had more time to spend practicing under his guidance, however I was grateful to have the little bit of time I had. If you ever by chance hear his name, and he is hosted by a yoga studio nearby, run, don't walk, and register. This is authenticity at it's best. Nothing added. Nothing fancy. Real. Unprocessed. Totally pure. Absolutely lovely.

Somehow I've been inspired by the power and energy of Iceland. Subtle yet strong. Back home there is much to take in. Setting wheels into motion. Challenges are a foot, but it's all good. I am thankful for the offerings to learn and grow in every instance. It feels good to be in this place. It feels good to be back home with DF.

Bless, Bless.

Icelandic Music

Somehow my yoga blog has turned into an all great things about Iceland travel blog, lol. Bear with me. I have one more thing to rave about and that's Iceland's music scene. I don't exaggerate when I say Iceland has the highest percentage of talented artists and musicians anywhere in the world. For a country this small it pumps out some pretty amazing stuff. It's unreal.

Today I found myself at a local music store in downtown Reykjavik desiring to find a few additions to my music collection, which is pretty pathetic by the way. I've been so unimpressed with what's been released in the mainstream lately that once I heard some of the Icelandic music acts I felt like finally my music thirst was quenched. I bought 7 Cds, and I never do that. Ever. And, there's more I want to get but I didn't have time! Let's just say I was more than impressed. What fun. I was like a kid in a candy store.

One of my favorites is Emilíana Torrini. Absolutely wonderful.

Emilíana Torrini

Of course I picked up a few Sigor Rós Cds, because you just have too, and I thought I would try something a bit different like Seabear, but believe me, there's so much more. So, so, so much more. 

  









                                 

 Mugison

Inspired by Iceland

Viggo Mortensen is inspired by Iceland from Inspired By Iceland on Vimeo.

Sigur Rós

Sigur Rós - Glósóli from Sigur Rós on Vimeo.

I'm really digging some of Iceland's homegrown music acts. Unique. Hypnotic. Learn more about Sigur Rós.

Icelandic Horses

Iceland breeds only one type of horse, the Icelandic horse. Seen just about everywhere dotting the countryside, they color the landscape in beautiful, picturesque fashion. No other horses are allowed into Iceland under any circumstances. Absolutely not. So strict with this policy, if an Icelandic horse leaves the country, it's not allowed back due to keeping tight control on the spread of disease, and keeping the breed pure.

One unique trait, besides their relative size, compared to other horses, is their gait. Even though I've only been exposed to horses on a handful of occasions I could clearly feel the difference in the Icelandic horse's step compared to other breeds I've ridden. It's quite interesting. 

I've always loved horses, and the Icelandic horses are especially cuddly and friendly, as one fellow traveler put it. I'd have to agree. Such beautiful, loving creatures.

Amazing Iceland

Iceland from ozan alptekin on Vimeo.

In Step

 The Pearl - Reykjavik, Iceland

"The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact than a drunken man is happier than a sober one."

(William Shakespeare)

Ah. In the past several weeks I've been out in left field. This is often where I find myself anyway. Haha. Departed from writing personal accounts on my blog I've been in heavy contemplation. I had no choice. When feelings come up this intense they must be dealt with. It's been one of those times where again I've had to look at myself, blatantly. Now I'm on a roll. Why stop? Once I've had the opportunity to name the fears I've held inside, as challenging as it is to look, nothing feels better then to be free of them.

I'm understanding how contemplative work is never a comfortable experience. It just isn't. It's rewarding, but never an easy going, fun ordeal. Much like consistent yoga practice - twisting, binding, bending, flexing, jumping isn't always fun, but we sure do feel better when it's all done. Makes it worth it.

What have I been tapping into? My emotions. I mean really taking a look at them. Somewhere along the path I've gotten into the habit of judging what I'm truly feeling. Doah! This pattern has gotten me stuck in various areas of my life. Really stuck. Conditioning I developed at a young age, it saved my ass in many instances, and to my amazement, is astonishing how deeply ingrained it is. 

Through the practice of yoga I've embraced the power to shed many layers, and this is another that has come up. Stuck emotions. Like I've said before, what's the use of practicing yoga if in turn I don't take the awareness developed by consciously opening to what needs to be shed. Shit! This has been a long time coming. Releasing feels like welcome liberation.

Everything comes to the forefront when the time is ripe. Like I've told many yoga students, a flower blooms when it's ready. With extra time in solitude, listening, I had no choice but to observe the place where I stand in NOW. It's beautiful, even though there's a multitude of feelings to be felt. Not all feel spectacular to begin with, but no matter, this is the juice of life.

No TV, no movies to watch, only a few books, being pulled out of distractions have allowed me to really sit with myself, and damn it, it's not so scary. Am I stepping into a greater appreciation of my being? Ha! I just might be.

My stay in Iceland is winding down. The time flew by. With it being my first time to discover this magical island I know I'll be back.

My unique experience regarding Iceland has been my dreams. I've had the most vivid dreams, in a stretch, than I can recall ever in my life. Seriously. I'm talking about gnarly, animated, dynamic dreams. Many mornings I've had to lie in bed and be like WTF was that? Really. Deciphering some of these vivid nightscapes has been like walking through a maze of the subconscious. Where do I start? Some type of energy is moving through. Not sure what, but the energetic nature of this place amplifies it.

Is this why Icelanders are so damn creataive? Hmmmm. I need to start writing down my nightly dramas. Who knows what it could lead to ...

Eyjafjallajökull, Iceland

Iceland, Eyjafjallajökull - May 1st and 2nd, 2010 from Sean Stiegemeier on Vimeo.


Amazing video of the Icelandic landscape and the Eyjafjallajökull volcano by Sean Stiegemeier. The music is by the Icelandic vocal artist Jónsi.

Sweat Lodge

The Sunday before last I participated in a traditional sweat lodge ceremony in a beautiful spot here in Reykjavik. An awesome and enlightening experience. Realizing there has been bad press regarding sweat lodges since the tragic event last fall, in Arizona, I wanted to give my own experience, because when done correctly, and I use the word correctly quite strongly, it can be a wonderful and beautiful process to go through. Obviously, it's been done for centuries in the Native American tradition, and had it's place in the larger scope of spiritual development in their culture.

In light of what took place in the unfortunate event the spiritual leader of the Lakota tribe is quoted as saying:

"Our First Nations People have to earn the right to pour the mini wic'oni (water of life) upon the inyan oyate (the stone people) in creating Inikag'a - by going on the vision quest for four years and four years Sundance. Then you are put through a ceremony to be painted - to recognize that you have now earned that right to take care of someone's life through purification. They should also be able to understand our sacred language, to be able to understand the messages from the Grandfathers, because they are ancient, they are our spirit ancestors. They walk and teach the values of our culture; in being humble, wise, caring and compassionate. What has happened in the news with the make shift sauna called the sweat lodge is not our ceremonial way of life!"

So, I'll put this out there right away, if you ever decide to participate in a traditional sweat lodge ceremony it is imperative you do one with someone who knows what they are doing! 

The sweat lodge leaders in Iceland have been doing ceremonies for over 20 years on a regular basis. Though it was challenging, I never once felt unsafe or uncared for. Through and through, it was a joyful experience in healing and transformation. You could feel the deep respect for the tradition, and the ancestral wisdom connected to it emanate off the sweat lodge leaders. One went on to tell me his deep love and respect for the Earth and how representative she is of abundance, love and support. He expressed how often in hard times we look to the sky, up toward the heavens for answers never really truly connecting to what is down below. The way he explained this was deeply touching, and more than just words, I felt his resonance with this connection through his energy. A special thing to witness.

The group was made up of 20 individuals almost equally divided between male and female. In the beginning we were given numerological readings corresponding with a color. The first color given is the one you are born with, which corresponds to a chakra. This is part of our essential make up. Then we were given a color for this year which again corresponds with a chakra which deals with lessons and challenges of this year.

I was told my essential color was light blue which connects to the throat chakra. A free spirit energy. It's important I express myself through various outlets. He went on to tell me more, which for now, I'd like to keep to myself. One thing that's quite interesting is much of what I was told didn't come as a surprise. Funny how we know the answers inside - all it takes is someone from the outside to tell it like it is for us to listen. Haha. More and more, I've come to the realization that I simply need to listen to my heart. It's knows.


The first part of the ceremony, we dance! Yes we dance! Dance! Dance! I had to dance for one solid hour in front of people I didn't know (no alcohol either, ha). For someone who can be quite shy in the beginning, I had to let it rip and start moving. Talk about a freeing experience. They played music to a high volume and the dancing seemed to go on and on and on. At first I was like, why? Then I got it. After while I felt like I was in a trance, opening to a space of feeling, movement and rhythm.

Next was the sweat lodge. I'm not sure how many have seen a sweat lodge, but it looks like a small hut of some sort, this one being round in shape. Beforehand, special rocks are heated for hours over an open fire to heat up the lodge. There are certain protocols during the ceremony, such as only entering in clockwise and leaving that way. Once everyone settled in, the rocks were placed in the middle of the lodge. We have to "welcome" each rock that is placed in the middle. When all the rocks were placed the leaders started with a few words. They spoke mostly Icelandic, with at bit of translation, but I got the gist. Basically we were told the more we put into the experience the more we will get out of it. To heal you must feel. They passed water around and towels dipped in ice cold water for everyone before closing the opening of the loge. Soon it was pitch black.

Sitting in an area absolutely pitch black is something like being in a time warp. Even one of the leaders explained it like this. The time spent inside never seems quite as long as we were really inside. Interesting. Right away you notice the blackness, and the heat. Then the leaders lead us through a series of chants. They said when loosing yourself in the chant one is better able to withstand the heat. Often our minds will make a situation feel worse than it is through obsessive thoughts. Hence, chanting really gets you through. During the round water is poured over the heated rocks, and the hut fills with hot steam.

We did a total of 6 rounds increasing with intensity. After each round the entryway is opened as a rush of fresh air came in. A welcome relief. The leaders made sure we consumed plenty of water before heading into the next round. Every round has a theme, and each one feels as if something were being released, and let go of. I allowed myself to be fully present in the process, chanting strongly with the others. There's never a need to be shy or insecure, heck it's so dark there's never a worry. Even though I was in there with other people, with the darkness, there is also a feeling of it's just me, and what's being pushed to the surface.

After the ceremony I can't even express how great it feels. Omg. It's amazing. When I went to change and quickly glanced at myself in the mirror I had to do a double take. I looked different. It was like I was wiped clean, and totally rejuvenated. I felt that way too. I had the cozy feeling of being deeply held. I had the best sleep ever that night.

This was actually my second sweat lodge experience, and the interesting and ironic part is that my first ceremony was in the outskirts of Sedona, Arizona where the tragic events actually happened. However, I was there for a totally different purpose, and my sweat lodge leader again knew what he was doing, and didn't differentiate from that. He took us to our edge, and with that being said, we always had control over when enough was enough.

In the same breath the grief I felt for those who lost their lives to this experience has tugged at my heart deeply. It's unfortunate on so many levels. Ceremonies such as this shouldn't be put into the hands of just anybody.  It deserves respect from where the ancestral wisdom came from and handled with utmost care. The leader needs to have gone through their own rites and rituals to then be able take others on such a quest of purification.

Will I do it again? If it presents itself in the fashion my previous experiences did I definitely will. They were never anything I've looked out to experience, but they found me. These rites of purification have a way of doing that no matter what they are.

It was magical, and to have done it in Iceland made it all the more special.

Iceland ♥

Beauty to be experienced!

Everyone it's time to put Iceland on your list of places to visit! 

The fascinating part of being on the land of fire and ice is not just the seer beauty of the place, but the fact there seems to be subtle energy circulating that runs deep. A challenge to put into words. Pulsating. Vibrating. An extremely young country in a geologic perspective, it's no wonder I felt the shift in energy when I landed over a month ago. 

Finally I get it! Through the years I've always heard how special Iceland was, but never truly convinced, until now. It must be experienced!

love this

 Boiling hot water fresh from the Earth

“look, i’m not trying to be an artist. i’m not really a self-proclaimed anything. i just want to be happy. and that’s different for everyone. the american dream ideal has been shoved down our throats since it developed, and hey man to each his own. that dream was somebodies once and it’s embedded in a thousand other people right now. but it’s not my dream. it’s not my goal. because i don’t want to look at myself in the mirror when i’m thirty and regret all of the things i never risked because everyone told me “you’re not going to get anywhere” - like what the fuck is “anywhere” even? who decided that i had to be something practical in order to be happy? i am awestruck, i am spellbound, i am shell-shocked, and i am exhilarated. but you know what i’m not? i’m not bored. i don’t ever want to wake up one day and realize that i am bored. that i am unimpressed with everything that everyone else told me mattered. i’d rather figure out where i belong then have somebody else decide for me. so i’m taking my chances. why?

why the fuck not.”

(violent femme)

Tweaks

 I love Iceland!

"Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you’d have preferred to talk."

(Doug Larson)

In the last couple days I've had the lovely gift of a tweaked back. The strange part is I'm able to do my practice with no problems. Almost as if I can bring mind over matter in a course of two hours or more. Then afterward, when my body cools down, the back doesn't feel so good. Not sure if it's the culmination of all the hiking coming into play or what. Guess it takes a while for it to settle in.

No matter. Life is full of tweaks. With a tweaked back, the lesson to be learned is in making an adjustment. Lately, I've had to address certain imbalances in my body and bring consciousness around them. With one leg slightly longer than the other, often I feel the imbalance in my sacrum. On side pinching. With that, I've had to find ways to lengthen through, and keep my right side more loose and fluid. Bringing in a sense of balance.

With various imbalances I can never take my vinyasa for granted. I must bring an extra amount mindfulness into the area of my low back with every upward facing dog. In the end, it a good thing, with tweaks I've learned an endless amount in regards to accessing a posture.

Ha! But for some reason I can't seem to get enough of hiking around Iceland. If anything the practice of yoga has allowed me commune with nature, and come to a place of vast inner appreciation of it. It's been awesome. Although, the beauty and energy of Iceland make it easy. Unspoiled. Pure. Geo-active. The list goes on, and the contrast of fire and ice has piqued my interest into the forces of nature. Definitely wasn't expecting this insight before I planned to come here. I welcome it.

Possibility

 Icelandic Beauty

"Love is the voice under all silences, the hope which has no opposite in fear; the strength so strong mere force is feebleness: the truth more first than sun, more last than star…"

(e.e. cummings)

  fjord 

The day after the climb it was back to business as usual. Practice in the morning. Sunday. The start of my practice week. However, after climbing over 4, 000 ft. on an incline makes for an interesting practice. An interesting practice indeed. On top of that my usual Primary Series class afterward, and a 3 hour afternoon workshop devoted to vinyasa, jumping back and jumping thru. A packed day.

To my surprise I was still a buzz of energy after hiking Hekla. Even after all the physical exhaustion I felt, and still feel today, a sense of renewed energy coursing through my body. This I was not expecting. I was expecting to be absolutely worthless and found it to be the exact opposite. 

I've never stopped myself from other activity because of worry of how it will affect my practice. Never. I don't see it that way. I feel the practice of yoga allows me to live more fully. Obviously I'm highly devoted to my practice, but through time I've realized it can't be my life. What it has done beautifully is open the reality into what's possible. To be in a space of limitlessness. Do I want to live big or do I want to live small? It doesn't have to mean scaling up mountains or tenuous physical challenges. It can be just as simple as offering a smile to a stranger.

In practice I continue to push the boundaries as to what I deem possible. It sets the stage to then go out in life and experience it. Living big isn't necessarily connected to material wealth, I'm talking about the spiritual wealth of active experience. Living this reality, fully open. Alive. Free.

The practice of yoga helps to open the channels, heightening our sensitivity to ourselves and to those around us. We stand better prepared to live in awareness. The critical step being what we decide to do with it. Standing in recognition. In a place of knowing and connection, to then go forth and live in yoga. Union. What's the point of coming to my mat bending and flexing if I don't make the connection off? This is the bridge I'm consciously crossing at the moment. I'm learning it never matters if I get knocked off my center. It's inevitable. But, am I able to bring myself back in daily life? This is key.

Even better, I'm making the connection not to judge myself too harshly with all my foibles. Oh! I have many! Again, learning this is where the juice is. There is no outer image to mold into. When I enter into a state of yoga it will express itself as unique as it's own, like a snowflake. One no better than the other, but extraordinary alone. 

It becomes evidently clear how the process NEVER ends. I'll never come to a place and be like, okay, I'm done. My learning is done. No. The depth we can grow into is endless. An ever expanding work of art. Which is comforting. Knowing life will continue to shift, grow, expand, contract, morph into ... anything.

Hekla {To the Gates of Hell}

 HEKLA   

photo by Anna Andres

"Challenges are what make life interesting; overcoming them is what makes life meaningful."

(Joshua J. Marine)

Ahhh. The saga continues. Everyone loves a good Icelandic saga, don't they? Never would I have thought I'd be so easily manipulated into climbing another mountain on this island nation. Never would I have thought ...

Last week I received a group email from the enthusiastic Icelandic hike leader. You know the one. With the bus. I don't know what kind of twisted destiny brought him into my Ashtanga Yoga New Beginners class but there's definitely been some devilish work at play. Getting back to the email, he excitedly stated the next hike would be to the summit of Hekla, the second most active volcano, depending who you speak to, in Iceland. The climb would be just under 1, 500 meters (4, 891 ft), about a 4 hour climb up. I read the email, and said to myself, HELL NO, and left it at that.


When I talked to the hike leader after class I explained the fact I didn't have hiking boots, went on to reiterate how the hike sounded a bit out of my league, and thanked him for keeping me in the loop. He seemed agreeable, and in a rush after class. I was in the clear. Whew. Dreams of the Blue Lagoon filled my brain. Now that's how to spend time in Iceland.

Later, I received a personal email from the infamous hike leader telling me he had a pair of hiking boots for me to borrow, went ahead and reserved a seat for me on that bus, and to remember, "body strong, mind weak." No he didn't, I thought! No he did not just serve me up my own words on a silver platter to swallow whole! Great. Just fucking great!

During our last class I talked a bit about one of Sri K. Pattabhi Jois's most famous sayings,"body strong, mind weak," in reference to how it is in our own minds that we perceive limitations, and that our bodies are ultimately strong and able. Anything is possible, blah. blah, blah. The thing is, I wholehearted resonate with this, but to then have someone challenge me on the very thing I said, well, well, well, NOW we're playing with the big dogs. Big, bad, Icelandic dogs. Nice. I was reluctant, but game on. If this is how he wants to play it, FINE! I'll go.

To get myself into the "spirit" of the hike, however reluctantly, I thought I'd do a bit of research on the most famous volcano in Iceland.  I found it quite interesting in medieval times it was considered the entrance to Hell. Pretty much Hell's front door. Okaaaay. Wow. They've got it all here, elves, trolls and entrances to hell. 

Moving on, the name literally means, "Hooded One" because the peak is usually capped by looming clouds. It sits restlessly in the Þjorsardakur Valley, surrounded by vast lava fields. The last eruption was in 2000. The last big one in 1970.

I didn't feel completely comforted hiking to an active volcano, especially when it stated on his email we would be warned of an oncoming explosion if there were a series of earthquakes. We'd have to be off the mountain within 30 minutes to 1 hour. Hmmmmm, I thought, and the actual decent takes 2, from my personal calculations the odds of getting down in time seemed slim. Gah! "Body strong, mind weak." What is there to fear. I was still game.

Then I decided to look in my Iceland, Lonely Planet and read up on Hekla where it clearly stated, "The volcano is due to blow its top again round 2010." Huh? I blinked my eyes. I must be reading this wrong. Nope. I read it again. Said the same thing. Great! Just fucking great! I can imagine it now, riding down the mountain on a wave of hot, molten, lava!!! NOT exactly the way I thought I would go.




But time marches on, life marches on. I was still due to go on this hike, given the risks. The biggest risk of all, the loss of my pride, lol.

I met the group at the designated check point. 14 nationalities represented, most if not all, except me, were graduate students in engineering, geology, and what have you. An interesting bunch. France, Italy, Sweden, US, UK, Austria, Spain, Iceland, Denmark, Thailand, Czech Republic, Germany, Switzerland, and Australia. Talk about representation.

Wow! It's a miracle! The exuberant hike leader was on time! Arrived in his usual joyous, energetic self. He never seems to tire. Always filled with energy and a zest for life. Must be all that mountain air, like I've said before. It's gotta be. I have no other explanation for it. Everyone quickly boarded the bus, then I was faced with hike leader number two, from my first Icelandic hiking experience. I saw the look on his face. It said it all. She's coming?! Oh God.

It was a quiet drive out to Hekla. Once off the main road, the bus ambled over to the trail head on a rough lava laden road. It was a bumpy ride, a slow, tiresome ride. During the drive I kept thinking maybe Hekla will blow right now so I don't have to go on this godforsaken climb. Wouldn't that be nice. Thinking it unlikely, I continued to amp myself up for what was ahead. With a group of experienced mountain hikers it was a task to feel worthy of going up. When the friendly, Australian girl next to me stated she'd be climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro in a couple weeks, it didn't exactly stroke my confidence, but nonetheless, "body strong, mind weak," eh?

Lava Fields

lava lava lava!

and more lava!

When we arrived to the trail head everyone tumbled out of the bus in usual fashion. Gear ready, bundled up, boots tied. I had my borrowed boots, about two sizes too big, wearing extra socks, no hiking poles, which could have come in handy later, but I continued to remind myself, this is a mental challenge, not merely physical. "Body strong, mind stronger!" Would I crack this time? Only time would tell. 

And we were off. The first part of the trek marching through an expanse of lava fields slowly climbing upward. I felt in good spirits even though the view to the top seemed like an endless journey. The peak of the mountain danced with the clouds. Don't look, I thought, just feel each step under your feet, better that way. To look up will only trip my mind. This seemed to help for I was able to keep pace with the first half of the group with no problems, except for a few areas of the ascent when I had to tell myself, whatever you do, DON'T look down. No looking up. No looking down. Just keeping moving one step at a time. 

We stopped for lunch at 1000 meters. I made it with no complaints. Of course the hike leader had to add his two cents in. 

Chiding me, "Oh Laruga, I was expecting you to be the last one in the pack!" 

Really, is he trying to be charming or just push my buttons. 

I smirked a bit, and simply said, "Ye of so little faith." 

Our banter was quite funny, and I needed to refuel. There was still quite a bit to go before we reached the top. 

 Climbing Hekla

What a view!

After lunch the group gathered up to make the final leg of the ascent. The snow was deeper. A challenge. I felt ready to go. I felt good. So I thought. Then things swiftly began to change as I started the climb. At first I was with the lead pack, then slowly one by one I was being passed as lactic acid started to build in my behind, then slowly move down my thighs, burning like hot fire. A hot fire I've never experienced before in my life! WTF, I thought. Oh, how swiftly the tides shifted from before lunch to after. It was like nothing, I'll say it again, like nothing I've ever experienced. I literally could only take five steps, then I had to rest. It had nothing to do with my cardiovascular system, that was fine. It was as if my lower body was sizzling, the lactic acid build up getting worse, and moving down to my calves. Seriously, WTF, was all I could say to myself. I was at the mercy of my puny legs. I was at the mercy of this godforsaken mountain. It wasn't looking good. It wasn't looking good at all. 

Somehow through all of it I wasn't the last one in the group, and quickly I was left alone in the middle. On a mountain, by myself. The pack to the front marching swiftly on, became smaller and smaller  toward the horizon of the peak. The pack behind me, slowly moving forward, and me in the middle. Wayward. Burning. Oh. The burning!

It was literally, five steps, rest, five steps, rest, sometimes only three ... and when a bit ambitious, I took ten. That was when I could psyche myself to push a bit more through the ache of my legs. Oh. How they ached! Slowly, but surly I made it upward. Then came the wind. I was stumbling into a whole new weather pattern. The wind howled powerfully feeling as if it could blow me off the ridge. I'm not kidding. This is where I started to get a bit mental. Thoughts of "body strong, mind stronger," were wavering, and it didn't help that I saw the lead pack already reach the summit in celebration. They seemed so far away. I felt so alone. It was me, the mountain, and the wind. And, somehow through the agony of my burning legs I kept moving forward. I was like the little train the could, barely. 

The interesting part was the mental component to the climb. I started to focus on every single one of my limitations. Intriguing. When the going gets tough I immediately went through the list of every negative I could find. My boots, are too big. I'm cold. I don't have muscular legs. I've never hiked in snow before. I've never hiked to the summit of a mountain no less. I don't have the proper equipment. It went on and on. Then I realized, how is this gonna help me? I had to turn my attitude around. I'm young. I'm strong. For God's sake I've got air in my lungs, let's move! Yah. That little pep talk lasted for about ten steps. Lol. "Body weak, mind weak." Blue Lagoon sounds so good right now. Why am I up here?

Alas, I was moving. However, I was losing feeling in my fingers, and felt tingling in my arms. Temps steadily dropping.

After the lead pack ended their celebration at the top, they began their descent. I was STILL on my way UP. My morale, on the way DOWN. They passed me by, all smiles, beaming. It's that mountain air I tell you. I did my best to be at peace with my state of affairs.

Then the hike leader starts charging his way toward me off the summit. 

"Laruga! We must get you up this mountain!!!"

Seriously where does this guy get all this energy? Really. I need to know. He can make the most sour, rotten batch of lemons in to the sweetest tasting lemonade. It must be a gift.

In my moment of peace. My moment of zen. The first things out of my mouth were ...

"I so don't like you right now!"

The wind howled and bellowed making it hard to hear. "WHAT?!" He yelled.

"I SAAAID, I SOO DON'T LIKE YOU RIGHT NOW!!!!!"

"Ahhh," he responded. Then he quickly took my hand and literally dragged me to the top, burning legs and all. He even threatened to throw me over his shoulder, Viking style, but I decided I better stay on my feet and make this climb legit, if you know what I mean. 

Again, his enthusiasm won out. 

Finally, I made it to the TOP! I freakin' made it to the top! Wooohoo! 

Me at the Top! 

Photo courtesy of Gunnlaugur B. Ólafsson

Never in my life have I felt more exhausted and exhilarated at the same time. Something happened to me up there, I tell you. There's something to scaling up a mountain, feeling as if you have nothing left, to make it, and breath it all in. It's fucking cool. No better way to describe it. None. 

"Body completely shattered, mind blown." I felt good. 

Because I was literally shivering into convulsions, the hike leader made me practically run down the mountain to maintain and build heat in my body. Snow makes for a soft landing on the way down. The best part, sliding on a few of the slopes directly on my bumb. THAT made my day. It's the proper way. It just is.

The descent

So the saga ends. I made it to the top of Hekla, with a bit of help. 

Am I glad I did it? 

Hell ya! 

Somehow the thirst for adventure and open possibility will always win out.

I tell you, ever since I made it to the top of that mountain, I've had a buzz. Seriously. There's something to it. Not sure what it is. All I can say, it must be that mountain air. 

The End. 

Mighty Hekla

Notice how I'm way in left field, literally! Lol.

Photo courtesy of Gunnlaugur B. Ólafsson

Happy Day

 Amazing Gaia!

Hot Springs 

"I hope nobody ever asks me what inspires me. Because that’s a stupid fucking question. There’s no answer to it. Nothing inspires me. Because it doesn’t take inspiration to create, to live, to destroy, to do. Anything and everything you want to bring into fruition is already within you. And it’s not a matter of calling it forth or waiting for something to sail into your life to open the doors of possibility. It’s a matter of being confident enough to just put what you need to into words, pictures, notes, or handshakes. A sturdy handshake is just as beautiful as piano concerto.
If it was a matter of inspiration, we’d all be sitting with our heads out the window waiting for signs that we were supposed to begin. We were born! Begin! The only inspiration should be the fact that your stupid, fat heart is beating."

                    (Digital Moleskine)

The Golden Circle

Faith is not about having the right answers. Faith is a feeling, faith is a hunch — a hunch that there is something bigger connecting us all.

(Unkown)

Þingvellir National Park

The Golden Circle. The popular sightseeing tour for foreign visitors. I decided to give the hike leader who took me on the torturous hike last week a second chance to redeem himself. Hahaha.  To my surprise he posted my blog commentary regarding the hike on his facebook page. I was a bit mortified when I found out. Quickly, I went back to reread my post hoping I didn't say anything too harsh. Whew. Good thing. I was honest, yet gentle. However, I cringe when thinking back, during the heat of the moment, while on last week's hike, how I told him if I would have known it would have been this bad, I wouldn't have come! Eeeek.

Good thing is, all is forgiven.

Fresh off his second chance, he picks up the group a half hour late! Ha! I feel compelled to add this in to give him a hard time. There's something about exuberant, excitable, enthusiastic, Icelandic hike leaders that have a way of getting under your skin, even with all their faults. Just kidding. No faults. There's something about being here that's gotten me a bit cheeky at the moment. At any rate, the hike leader had enough energy to put everyone in a delightful mood.  Even me, when feeling sour. That's no easy feet, let me tell you. Which was nice. Must be the mountain air or untainted drinking water.  He knows every mountain on this side of Iceland like the back of his hand and drives a tricked out bus. Believe me, it's nothing like the buses cruising around here.

"It's got personality." 

 This is how we roll ...

First stop on the Gloden Circle, Þingvellir National Park. What an expansive landscape! And, for dramatic affect, you can stand between the North American and Eurasian continental plates. You actually see where they are pulling apart at a rate of 19 mm per year. Fascinating.

The split between the North American and Eurasian Continental Plates.

Þingvellir National Park

 Þingvellir National Park

Second stop, a view of water shooting out of the ground with theatrical flair. Oh, how Mother Nature teases us with all her antics, as tourists circle the geysers, cameras in hand, ready to snap a shot. The Geysir geothermal area has an abundance of geothermal springs everywhere, steam lifting off in various parts of the park. Pretty awesome.

 Tic

 Tic

 BOOM!

Third stop, the queen of Iceland's waterfalls, Gullfoss. What magnificent beauty and power this waterfall exuded. Quite breathtaking. Once closer to the waterfall, you can feel the force of the rushing water, the temperature dropping a good ten degrees, and windy as hell. I loved it. Talk about prana. It's in abundance. Alive with energy.

 Gullfoss Waterfall

 

 A closer look at Gullfoss

And, last but not least, a 3 km hike to take a dip in a natural hot spring. This is one of the most incredible and special things about Iceland. The land of fire and ice. Even on a cool day, you can sit in a hot spring, out in nature, without a care in the world. Now that's something. Deep in the hills, hidden down in an exquisite, glorious valley, as if in the middle of nowhere. This is life.

 Valley of steam from hot springs.

So to wrap it all up. I was asked time and time and time again, by the hike leader, "Did I redeem myself?"

YES!

In all seriousness, I would recommend him over many of the tours given. He gives a personal touch to seeing Iceland, and c'mon it's all about the bus.